GenderDysphoria.fyi/public/tw/euphoria.md

---
date: "2020-01-26T20:41:55.827Z"
lang: "tw"
title: "性別不安的表現: 欣快感"
linkTitle: "性別欣快"
description: "有陰影的地方就一定有光。"
preBody: '_disclaimer'
siblings:
  prev: /tw/history
  prevCaption: 性別不安的歷史
  next: /tw/physical-dysphoria
  nextCaption: 身體不安
classes:
  - gdb
tweets:
  - '1215716433210105856'
  - https://twitter.com/ErinInTheMorn/status/1228141518386585607
  - https://twitter.com/TwippingVanilla/status/1228165207316287489
  - https://twitter.com/ErinInTheMorn/status/1228165767264256003
---

# 性別欣快

{!{
<div class="gutter"><blockquote>
  <strong>欣快感 Eu·pho·ri·a</strong> - <em>名詞</em><br>
  <!-- A feeling or state of intense excitement and happiness. Elation, joy, glee. -->
  一種強烈興奮和快樂的感覺或狀態。狂喜、喜悅、歡欣。
</blockquote></div>
}!}


<!-- Before I can talk about discomfort, I have to talk about relief. Gender euphoria is itself a sign of gender dysphoria. You might be asking yourself, "how can happiness be sadness?" The answer to that is simple. -->

在談論不舒服之前，我必須先談論解脫。性別愉悅本身就是性別焦慮的跡象。你可能會問自己：「快樂怎麼可能是悲傷？」答案很簡單。

<!-- Imagine a person who was born in a cave, who spent their entire life living underground, with their only source of illumination being candles and oil lamps. Imagine they've never been above ground; they don't even know the surface exists. Then, one day, a cave-in happens in a side tunnel, and reveals an opening to the surface. Sunlight pours into the opening, and at first it is blinding and the person runs away in fear. Later, they return to the opening, and, as the person's eyes adjust, they look out through the hole and see a bright and brilliant world full of colors they didn't even know existed. -->

想像一個人生來就在洞穴中的人，一生都在地下生活，唯一的照明來源是蠟燭和油燈。想像他們從未在地面上生活過，他們甚至不知道地面的存在。然後，有一天，一側隧道發生了坍塌，露出了通往地面的開口。陽光照進開口，起初它是耀眼的，那人嚇得逃跑了。後來，他們回到開口處，隨著眼睛的適應，他們透過洞口看到一個明亮而燦爛的世界，充滿了他們甚至不知道存在過的顏色。

<!-- That world is scary, huge, and full of unknowns, so they crawl back into the cave for safety, but that hole is still there, and they see the light every time they pass it. Gradually, they peek out more and more frequently, and further and further from the opening. They start to want that light; they find reasons to visit it more often. -->

那個世界很可怕、很大、充滿未知，所以他們爬回洞裡求安全，但那個洞還在，每次經過時他們都能看到光。漸漸地，他們更頻繁地窺視，並且離開口越來越遠。他們開始想要那道光；他們找到更多理由去拜訪它。

<!-- Eventually they realize that they don't want to go back into the hole any more. They have to go back, because that is where their family and friends are, but this place is so much better, and they want to stay here. Going back into the hole feels wrong; it starts to hurt to be in the dark so much. -->

最終，他們意識到自己不想再回到洞裡了。他們必須回去，因為那是他們的家人和朋友所在的地方，但這個地方好多了，他們想留下來。回到洞裡感覺不對；在黑暗中待太久開始感到痛苦。

<!-- This is what gender euphoria is like: brief flashes of a light that may be too bright to handle at first, too confusing to understand, but as time goes on you become more accustomed to them and you realize that this is where you belong, and the darkness becomes the dysphoria. -->

這就是性別欣快的樣子：最初可能太刺眼而無法處理、太混亂而無法理解的光的短暫閃爍，但隨著時間的推移，你變得越來越習慣它們，你意識到這就是你屬於的地方，而黑暗變成了焦慮。

{!{ <div class="gutter">{{import '~/tweet' ids=[
  '1215716433210105856'
] tweets=meta.tweets className="hide-reply" }}</div> }!}

<!-- Many trans people have no idea how much pain they are in until they find small bits of relief. Cosplay, stage acting, drag, role playing games, video games; small little forays into a different gender than they have lived as. They find that it feels just a little bit more comfortable. They'll make up excuses for why ("If I'm gonna be looking at this character's ass, it might as well be a girl's ass."), they'll try to convince themselves it's all just for fun, or an artistic expression. They might tell themselves that the bits of joy they feel at hearing a different pronoun are just novelty. But soon they find themselves looking for reasons to get that more often. More and more frequently they're role playing characters of a different sex, building more costumes, buying more clothes, performing more often. You find yourself wanting to do that all the time, because it just feels better than your real life, and being "you" starts to hurt. Eventually, the old you becomes the costume. -->

許多跨性別者在找到微小的解脫之前，都不知道自己有多痛苦。角色扮演、舞台表演、變裝、角色扮演遊戲、電子遊戲；對他們所生活的性別之外的不同性別的小小嘗試。他們發現這感覺舒服了一點點。他們會為此編造藉口（「如果我要看這個角色的屁股，那還不如是女生的屁股。」），他們會試圖說服自己這一切只是為了好玩，或者是一種藝術表達。他們可能會告訴自己，聽到不同的代詞而感到的一點點喜悅只是新鮮感。但很快他們就會發現自己尋找更多的理由來獲得這種感覺。他們越來越頻繁地扮演不同性別的角色，製作更多的服裝，購買更多的衣服，更頻繁地表演。你會發現自己一直想這樣做，因為這比現實生活感覺更好，「你」開始感到痛苦。最終，舊的你變成了服裝。

<!-- This is the most fundamental reason why we as a community say "you do not need dysphoria to be trans", because black ink on a black canvas isn't visible without close examination and a lot of light. -->

這就是我們作為一個社群說「你不必有不安才能是跨性別者」的最根本原因，因為黑畫布上的黑色墨水如果不仔細檢查和大量的光線是看不見的。

<!-- Anything that can be a source of dysphoria has an equal and opposite euphoria. -->

任何可能成為不安感源頭的東西都有同等且相反的欣快感。

{!{ <div class="print-break-before"></div> }!}

{!{ <div class="gutter">{{import '~/tweet' ids=[
  '1228141518386585607'
  '1228165207316287489'
  '1228165767264256003'
] tweets=meta.tweets className="hide-reply" }}</div> }!}

舉例來說:

<!-- - Being gendered correctly
- Being addressed by your chosen name
- Wearing correctly-gendered clothing
- Seeing and feeling changes in your body
- Seeing yourself in the mirror (removal of depersonalization)
- Socializing in a way that conforms with gendered expectations
- Getting a haircut in a masculine / feminine / androgynous manner
- Shaving your legs
- NOT shaving your legs
- Being included in something you wouldn't otherwise because of your assigned gender (e.g. bridal shower or bachelor party)
- Feeling sexy / having sex in a way that aligns with your gender and sexuality. -->

- 被正確地辨識性別
- 被用你選擇的名字稱呼
- 穿著符合性別認同的服裝
- 看到並感覺到身體的變化
- 在鏡子裡看到自己（消除失自我感）
- 以符合性別期待的方式進行社交
- 以男性化/女性化/中性風格剪頭髮
- 刮腿毛
- *不*刮腿毛
- 因為你的性別認同而被納入你原本不會參與的活動（例如：單身派對(bridal shower / bachelor party)）
- 感到性感/以符合你的性別和性向的方式進行性行為

<!-- Even just being out in the world as yourself and being seen as yourself can be massively euphoric. -->

即使只是做自己並被視為真正的自己，在世界上也能感受到巨大的欣快感。

<!-- **What euphoria is NOT** is a sexual high, turn-on, or fetish. Sometimes euphoria can trigger a sexual response, and there are many factors at play that cause that (feeling good about your body is a turn-on, for example), but it is not a source of sexual excitement. Trans people are not "getting off" on presenting or acting like their true selves. -->

**欣快感**並**不是**性高潮、性興奮或是戀物癖(fetish)。有時欣快感會引發性反應，而造成這種情況的原因有很多（例如，對自己的身體感覺良好是一種興奮），但它本身並不是性興奮的來源。跨性別者並不會因為展現或表現得像他們真正的自己而「得到快感」。

<!-- That said, many people who have not yet realized they are trans may resort to fetishes and kinks to express their gender and/or relieve their dysphoria. They may maintain some of these kinks through transition. There is no shame in this; how they find sexual fulfillment is their own business. However, these things are *alongside* their gender. A trans person's sense of gender persists indefinitely; it does not go away when they go back to their daily lives. -->

話雖如此，許多尚未意識到自己是跨性別者的人可能會訴諸戀物癖和禁羈(kink)來表達他們的性別認同和/或減輕他們的性別不安。他們可能會在轉變過程中保留其中一些禁羈。這並沒有什麼好羞愧的；他們如何找到性滿足是他們自己的事。然而，這些東西是與他們的性別認同*並存*的。跨性別者的性別認同會持續存在；當他們回到日常生活時，它並不會消失。